tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22001031.post5878763386823396455..comments2024-02-28T18:29:41.120-08:00Comments on Not of General Interest: Short post on excusesundinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05589384016564587214noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22001031.post-7724429794315743652009-10-18T10:03:58.128-07:002009-10-18T10:03:58.128-07:00Yes, exactly! :) (And then it's hard not to ...Yes, exactly! :) (And then it's hard not to cave when the person is clearly taken aback by my barking or whatever way it comes out.) Well, at least we're saying it, right? Go, us!Inkhttp://inktopia.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22001031.post-2743617472817038452009-10-18T09:20:36.489-07:002009-10-18T09:20:36.489-07:00Ink, I know what you mean: sometimes the "no&...Ink, I know what you mean: sometimes the "no" comes out in ways that startle the person who asked me, because I have to put so much energy behind it. <br /><br />Anon, it is a form of guilt. We don't feel that we have the right to our time. I wish you weren't right about "less available/more respect," but you totally are. <br /><br />AnnieEm, welcome! Your VP did what more of them should do. <br /><br />tenthmedieval, I think it can be a gender OR a junior social status thing. In this case, it wasn't their fault but mine for acquiescing, in part because I didn't know there was an alternative.undinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05589384016564587214noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22001031.post-53392996248949397912009-10-17T16:10:04.730-07:002009-10-17T16:10:04.730-07:00That's weird. I recognise that as a fault of m...That's weird. I recognise that as a fault of my own but I would never have thought it gendered. Isn't this just a normal reaction for the articulate but socially junior?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22001031.post-69683053675799651892009-10-16T13:04:32.736-07:002009-10-16T13:04:32.736-07:00Hi Undine,
Consider this a TEST comment---I read y...Hi Undine,<br />Consider this a TEST comment---I read your blog regularly, but for some reason I have much trouble posting to blogger!<br /><br />Many moons ago the VP announced at a full faculty meeting on promo and tenure issues that it is OK to say "no": "For example," he said, "Annie said no to me just yesterday, and I applaud her!"<br /><br />It was my first time saying no also...<br />AnnieAnnie Emhttp://annieem.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22001031.post-39738673175888851692009-10-16T10:56:36.023-07:002009-10-16T10:56:36.023-07:00I think it's some form of *guilt* that propels...I think it's some form of *guilt* that propels women into handing out these gratuitous and totally unnecessary explanations. <br /><br />The less available we are, the more respect (and gratitude) we earn. <br /><br />Most men appear to be born with this attitude. <br /><br />I'd love to say that I'm a dab hand at saying NO minus any explanations but I still have to psyche myself up to do it. But, by God, it's worth it!<br /><br />Well Done Undine and keep it up!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22001031.post-43500433553402420772009-10-16T09:24:36.210-07:002009-10-16T09:24:36.210-07:00I hear you! I'm still terrible at no. When I...I hear you! I'm still terrible at no. When I do manage to say it, I can't control the tone (because it takes so much energy just to say it). So I end up either barking or bumbling out something like, "No. Ok? No. Sorry. Because...well, just no. "<br /><br />Good on you, though, for doing it!Inkhttp://inktopia.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.com